Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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