I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
