he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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