I'm really into asian looking animals
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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