She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize