Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
