Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Randomize
