sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
