I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
