it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
