hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
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