just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
