Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
they need to just BURY HIM!
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
