Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
