im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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