considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
