There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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