i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
