It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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