Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
