Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
