She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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