The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize
