I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
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