I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
