Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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