Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
