i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
