I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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