I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Green mimosas i think yes
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
