he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Randomize
