a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
