Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
