Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
