I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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