OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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