the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize