Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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