So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
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