ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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