He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
You are a genius and a whore.
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