Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
