You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
