You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
My cat gives me a boner
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Randomize
