Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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