I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
this will be a night to untag.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
