I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
