She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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