He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize