Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
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