Dual....:-)
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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