so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize